Father - I've been writing and praying and twirling. I've been tearing up or laughing at random. I've been under so much for so long. Yes, I asked You to get me to the point where I'd yield to You. I know that making me something You can completely love can only be done by getting rid of everything that's unloveable, imperfect. You want what's BEST for me, not what's easy.
I want You, whatever that means. There's no hold on me. Pull me into You. This place never made sense to me, but You are solid. I am a spinning ragamuffin; I'm a self conscious nut. I "think too much"; I feel all over the place; I don't like things being up in the air. You're pushing me; keep pushing me. You're changing me; do so!
Just keep me in You and hold me tight.
REMEMBER ME ACCORDING TO YOUR LOVE.
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