Father, I feel so stymied. Isn't it odd that it would take someone else's announcing their failings (thereby giving my soul a jerk) to get me what I've been so earnestly seeking: this stronger connection with You. I'm beginning to understand what Paul meant when he said that we rejoice in hard times! They make me hurt, even when they're other people's hard times, but I seek You out with all my heart and You recieve me back again so very gently and lovingly.
What right have I to be hurt because someone else messed up? None. Absolutely none. Why am I so swayed by it then? Because I love my friends, all of them, and it hurts me to see them messed over - even by themselves. I hurt inside even when I see or hear about complete strangers that aren't living Your way. It seems to hurt people so much when they do that. I can't relate to most of the sin, but I hurt inside even just because I know that it hurts You deeply; and these folk treat it so cavalierly. You say it's like they're putting You up on the Cross again, nailing You down, beating You. That makes me feel like crying; it's one of the main reasons I try so hard not to "grieve the Holy Spirit". I'm not trying to be the world's policeman or a self-righteous jerk - I'm not saying I'm any better. It just hurts me inside and I end up crying and begging You to forgive them and me and everyone else involved and to please guide us. Oi, Lord, please help.
Jun 4, 2005
Oi
You know the thing I hate most about extra-marital sex? It destroys lives.
Joe, you were stupid. You're not yet twenty years old, you work a couple of minimum wage jobs, there's no way you can support a family. Above and beyond all that, you'd consecrated your body to God and sworn off till marriage. When I first read your post, I wanted to cry. You've hurt yourself, you've hurt another person - and those are bad enough - but above and beyond that, you've hurt God. I still want to cry for you, because you're destroying your life; both the one here and the one that is coming.
It's not like the whole thing was a momentary loss of control; you planned it all out. Your main regrets are that condoms are so expensive and that you've (temporarily, in your mind) messed up a good friendship. That's foolish, Joe. And, if the condom messed up and you end up with a baby on the way, what will you do? You believe abortion is murder, so you'll have the girl keep your baby. You'll probably get married. You'll end up just like my brothers and my sister - your life ruined, stuck in a minimum wage job that doesn't support your family, possibly stuck with an annoying one-week-stand that's stretched out "till death do you part", mimicking the very thing you despise: your parent's idea of family planning, ticked off at life and struggling through it, all because of one stupid decision.
Oi, my foolish, foolish friend. God forgive you.
Joe, you were stupid. You're not yet twenty years old, you work a couple of minimum wage jobs, there's no way you can support a family. Above and beyond all that, you'd consecrated your body to God and sworn off till marriage. When I first read your post, I wanted to cry. You've hurt yourself, you've hurt another person - and those are bad enough - but above and beyond that, you've hurt God. I still want to cry for you, because you're destroying your life; both the one here and the one that is coming.
It's not like the whole thing was a momentary loss of control; you planned it all out. Your main regrets are that condoms are so expensive and that you've (temporarily, in your mind) messed up a good friendship. That's foolish, Joe. And, if the condom messed up and you end up with a baby on the way, what will you do? You believe abortion is murder, so you'll have the girl keep your baby. You'll probably get married. You'll end up just like my brothers and my sister - your life ruined, stuck in a minimum wage job that doesn't support your family, possibly stuck with an annoying one-week-stand that's stretched out "till death do you part", mimicking the very thing you despise: your parent's idea of family planning, ticked off at life and struggling through it, all because of one stupid decision.
Oi, my foolish, foolish friend. God forgive you.
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