rambling

If I look good, I'm going biking tomorrow. Depending on how good I look, I might drag the swimsuit along too...but probably not.

I am lonely, Lord, and yet I have friends. Not many in here, in fact, only one here and that one the one I must guard against. I do a horrible job of guarding, Father. Either I guard agaist this or a lose yet another friend. And yet, I hate guarding.

You made me myself. Help me live like You want me to....Daddy? I really want to look good tomorrow. I'm getting rather lost in all this. I feel like I've slid into one of those huge t-shirts I'm so emphatically fond of. Usually the feeling of being a tiny being lost in billowing folds is comforting, but, at the moment, I don't know what I'm wrapped in, and that confuses me. I don't want to lose another friend. I want to keep my friends; they mean a lot to me. Help me learn this lesson.

I give You my words and actions - help me, Daddy. Protect me, the way that You do when I'm driving. Guide me, the way that You do when You have me act in Your Name. Comfort me, the way that You do when I'm crying. Support me, the way that You do when my world falls apart. Help me, the way that You do because You love me and made me who I am, with all these nutty moods and poses and loves and confusions. Give this friend to me, the way that You gave me the front parking space at the beach this morning, despite the fact that the entire parking lot was filled, just because I asked and because You love me. Give this friend to me as friend, but You take them first and wholly, and, God, please take them and make them whole.