the sky resembles a backlit canopy .... with holes punched in it

Round and round, we dance in circles
Hindsight’s twenty-twenty
Your erasures, my concerns
A smile, pull me back

Rings of silver, never gold
Who’d want it, anyway?
Language, lovers, friends, apart
Six 22 affairs– why, love?

No one’s like you
I’m back where I started
Different endings in your eyes
“Not what you expected”

He tells me “as not having”
You talk to me of “friends”
They think you care for me
I toss my head and spin

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Oh, Father, I'm glad. I don't know what's going on or where this will end, but, oh! Father, I want to kiss Your face and hug You tight. I want to dance (and I can't dance!); I want to twirl. I have climbed trees. I want to stay in this delirious happiness for a while, but, Father, even while I'm here build joy into me. Build permanency into me.

Remember me according to Your love. Keep me walking with You; smile at the things I do and want. My crazy, mixed up head is happy, Father, and You've told me that I'm headed the right way. I have no idea where this is going, but I want You most of all. I've climbed trees and mountains; I've seen a smile that's in his eyes again (and I never thought I would); the semester's nearly over; I'm going home.

Spin with me, Lord! Be loud for me. I need to hear You clearly. Oh! Father, make me want what You want - make surrendering to Your will a soul-shocking pleasure. Be pleased with me.

And thank You.

bat eloheynu

"Something close to your heart - something that doesn't fit in with people's expectations ... you know, somewhere deep inside you, what He wants you to do. Get past all the distractions and quiet all the clutter, and you'll know."

"I would say to you: don't be afraid. Don't feel bound by other people's expectations or even what you have wanted and expected for yourself."

"A well, surrounded by stones and covered. Inside was pure, sweet water, but that wasn't all. Water was pouring into the well, filling it up."

-------

( I Cor 7:29-31 )
HAVE AS NOT HAVING ...
(a.k.a. do not be fettered to or by what you have or are given)

( Matthew 7:9-11 )
... and KNOW THAT HE GIVES GOOD GIFTS TO HIS CHILDREN

to Him who breathed His life into man

"parts of you must die, are dying"

I'm learning, Father. There's so much further to go. I want You. I need You horribly deep in my soul; I'm dying inside, Father. Without You, there is emptiness. You've always been Life to me, but, now, my life is going and I have only Yours. It's such a deep, rich, bright, joyous life You give me, Father, but, oh Father, it hurts to die.

Oh, Father. Pull me closer to You. Ruffle my hair and let my tired head rest on Your chest. I want You more than anything. Help me obey; help me want to obey. You are asking what I hold most dear - You are asking what I would rather die than give up - and I don't want to give it. You know. You know, Father. Draw me forward, holding Your hand; You know I want to go with You.

Bring me into what You want me to be.